Being a Dad
Updated: May 19, 2020
Through my experience, I have been faced with very similar challenges in all the contexts that I have
worked in. Problems present themselves mostly through a child’s behaviour or academic performance, but behind this there is a desperate need from the child and the parents to be seen, heard and understood. This looks very different from family to family, but underneath it’s all very similar. I was, and am still presented with parents who are going through difficult times with their children (or their partner or parents) and they ask for help, or in many cases for me to fix the problem. I cannot fix problems, but I can assist clients to address their problems and make the necessary changes. I saw this need constantly presenting itself to me and so I decided to start running talks and presentations to parents so that I could reach a broader audience as opposed to the individual cases.
It has been clear that the vast majority of attendees are mom’s, in fact the bulk of talk and presentations on the topic of children and families is generally geared towards moms, and this extend to the majority of workshops and courses I have attended over the years, that have been predominantly female attendees. I often felt out of place and as though the talks were not for me, which lead me to the question of, what about the dads?
Dad’s play a critical role in the development of a child, whether biological, or not. The father-figure role that a child (both boys and girls) needs to interact with plays such a critical role that there is research to suggest that “fatherlessness is possibly the single biggest driver for social dysfunction in communities around the world” (Wilkinson, 2013, p. 94). Being a dad is an incredible job, or rather an incredible privilege. Let’s work towards being the best dad’s we can be, to give our kids (sons and daughters) an unforgettable childhood that they can share and pass onto their children.
DAD by Craig Wilkinson
A couple years agoI attended a talk by Craig Wilkinson where he shared his story and his insights that lead to his book “Dad”.
I refer parents (moms and dads) to this book regularly as it conveys the significance of the dad-role in a child’s life, along with some very important lessons and understandings about the (as Craig puts it) “responsibility-laced privilege” of being a dad.I highly recommend that you get your hands on this book (digital or hard copy). There is even an interactive online course you can do for a more hands on approach.